I’d like to turn this topic into a podcast in the next week or two, but first I’m going to write this article as “notes” to work from.
1. Looking for a path
This was definitely one of the major reasons for my internet addiction. When I was young (nine years old), my father had a heart attack and passed away. I have a Stepdad who has been very good to me, who has guided me and helped me tremendously. But! In today’s world, even two fathers is not enough. There are just so many “fronts” young men have to fight on nowadays. From avoiding debt, to paying off debt, learning how to budget, learning how to invest in stocks, learning how to build your business, learning how to make a website, learning how to monetize…learning starting strength and powerlifting and bodybuilding, learning how to box, learning kick boxing, learning judo, learning night game, learning day game, learning sales, learning emotional control, mindset, how to be happy….
Because the world is so different than it was 50 years ago, Millenials (myself included) have been wading unarmed into unknown territory for a lot of these subjects. Should you study for a STEM career? Computer programming? Stand-up comedy? App developer? Plumbing? Welding? What is a sure path to a simple but good-enough life? So as a young man, I spent years googling and googling looking for answers. Have you done the same? The point is, after 10 or so years, I have found the answers to my questions. I don’t need to google that stuff anymore. I just need to do the work and put in the hours.
Most of the people I spend time with are hyper-creative and intelligent. I don’t say that to brag. In fact, “thinking too much” is another way of saying “over thinking”. Which is another way to say “second guessing” or “undecided” or not fully committed to an A to B plan.
If you have ever created anything…you are a creative person. Your mind must get rid of your creativity one way or another.
Either you do what your soul and brain were designed for: producing art and expressing emotion
You can piss it away on hours of Youtube videos, stupid articles, and forums.
3. Escapism (You live with your parents)
A very simple reason for internet addiction and porn addiction is that you live with your parents and you really don’t like it. You don’t like your car. Or you can’t afford a car. You hate your job. Or you don’t have a job. Or you can’t get laid. Or you don’t have friends with momentum. The Internet contains an almost-unlimited amount of distraction and raw information to keep your hamster wheel spinning on subjects other than your own life and the work you have to do. But hey, you can turn it off. You can block sites with Mobicip.
4. Looking for connection, lack of a tribe
In the age of single-parent households and single-child “families”, it can be hard to form familial bonds or find kindred spirits. Many, many people don’t have a real tribe they belong to. They have a smartphone, or a desktop, and that’s about it. The average person spends 8 hours a month on facebook. I deleted my facebook five months ago. I spend zero hours per month on Facebook.
Do you know how many “Facebook friends” I miss? None. I see my friends way more now.
Last December, one of my buddies from high school bought a condemned, dilapitated house for $90,000. I helped him fix it up a couple times a month through the Spring and Summer. By late August 2016, it was habitable. He was already living in it since December 2016, but uhhh, it wasn’t very habitable.
I’ve been living with two of my best friends for six months now. I no longer have to look for connection or a tribe. We have a tribe. We are a house full of monkeys, some would say chimps. Life is too short and too fast.
Have fun out there,